Lemons, Lemonade, and Grape Juice

Although I strive to keep a positive outlook on like I won’t deny it: sometimes, life just sucks.  Nothing seems to go your way, no matter how hard you try.  Just when it seems like things are finally turning around, something else goes wrong and sends us back to square one.  We’ve all experienced at least one of these stretches.  I’m fighting my way out of one right now.

The good news?  We have the power within us to break out of these slumps and emerge stronger than ever, but only if we choose to make this slump a learning experience.  The old cliché goes, “When life gives you lemon, make lemonade.”  I feel that this statement doesn’t go deep enough.  To me, this old maxim implies simply taking the bad and finding something good to turn the bad into something acceptable.

My take on it (and I’m shamelessly going philosophical on Facebook bumper sticker; cut me a break please, I am writing this during a philosophy lecture): “When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then let the world wonder how you did it.”  It sounds outlandish, but think about it for a second: take the bad and do something so amazing with it that people just don’t understand how you did it.

This requires some unconventional thinking on our parts, but then again, isn’t that the idea of the Zen College Life?  We can choose to view these rough patches as an opportunity to improve ourselves.  If we take full advantage of this learning experience, we can emerge better than ever, leaving those around us to gasp in awe as they try to figure out how the heck we did it during such trying times.

So, how do we do it?

1)    Pinpoint what’s getting you down: What exactly is the cause of your blues?  Was it a particularly bad exam that left you feeling clueless?  Was it an argument with a friend?  Was it a problem at work?  Be specific.

2)    Analyze what went wrong: This is one of the more difficult parts, as it requires you to take an honest and self-critical look at yourself.  Did you study enough for the test?  What caused the argument?  What role did you play in causing it?  Where did the project go wrong?  Again, specificity is key.

3)    Pick out the things that need to be worked on: No small task in itself, this step again requires you to describe exactly what you need to do.  For example, you may say: I did poorly on this test because I didn’t study enough or I didn’t study the right way.  Therefore, I need to find a way to study more effectively.  Broken record alert: Be as specific as possible.

4)    Go do it! After describing what you need to work on, set about working on it!  Go talk to your professor and work on study or memory skills.  Talk to your friend and find out what went wrong and what you both resolve to work on.  Dive into that new project and make it work.

5)    Adapt along the way: This goes back to the “Ready, Fire, Aim!” idea.  Information paralysis can be deadly.  You have a goal: improve this aspect or that skill.  Now, work like crazy to achieve that goal, but don’t stay stuck on a single path.  Keep striving for that goal, but stay flexible so you’re able to adapt to new challenges you meet along the way.  There’s one goal but multiple ways of achieving it.

6)    Sit Back and Enjoy the Grape Juice: You’ve taken on what life has thrown your way and used it to grow stronger.  Way to go!  After all your hard work to transform your life, take the time to look back on what you’ve accomplished and enjoy the fruits of your labor for a bit.  It’s important to constantly strive to improve yourself, but what good is improvement if you don’t take the time to enjoy it?

Life moves pretty fast. You don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.

What do you do to find the strength to overcome these rough stretches of life? I hope this post got you thinking about how you can work to overcome those rough stretches that life will throw at you from time to time. In the meantime, I’m off to go make some grape juice.